Healthy Marriage, Healthy Household

Having a child changes everything. I mean EVERYTHING! From getting ready in the morning, getting out of the car, having alone time, traveling, having to get child care, food, cleaning the house, a trip to the market, etc… That said, there is one area that needs CONSTANT love and nurturing, and that is MARRIAGE. I never thought my marriage would change drastically. So MANY things change, even things that most would deem small enough to think about, like having to talk over a yelling baby… to having alone time, to having a small human being in between us two.

Your marriage should be just as important as taking care of your child. If there is no healthy marriage, there is no healthy household. I have a lot going on Every. Single. Day. I mean a lot, and even more going on in my F*** mind. It is hard, I am constantly doing things, and I feel like I am going crazy at times. I work full time, I am always working on L.A Mamacitas, plus a plethora of thoughts in my head: I haven’t written a blog post, I am always talking to people, I need to clean the house, I want to hang out with my family, I need to answer emails, I need to play with Julianna, I need to answer that F*** text, I need to check on my best friends, I need to play with Julianna.

Did you notice how I didn’t mention my husband? You guys, my husband does A LOT for me. He supports me in absolutely everything that I do. Sometimes I need to take a step back and reflect on my priorities. He takes our marriage and goes above and beyond for me. I wish people spoke about this subject more- how important it is to nurture and love your significant other. It is upsetting when I know I haven’t been intimate with my husband, it upsets me when I haven’t told him how much I love him, and how I forgot to thank him for doing that task that I couldn’t, or how I love the way he teaches Julianna new things. It goes both ways, he must nurture me the way I nurture him. He must take the time and reflect on his priorities the way I do. WE must do this together, WE must be a team.

If you haven’t spent alone time with your husband in a while, do it NOW! Take the kids to a babysitter and go to the closest restaurant there is…even a hole in a wall. Put the phones away and talk. If you can’t do that, pick up the kids a little later from the babysitters after work and meet your husband back home. Spend an hour at least to yourselves. Once the kids are asleep, turn everything off- go have a glass of wine together in the kitchen. TRAVEL alone. Go someone near, go somewhere far, but do it alone. Your kids feed off the energy of YOUR marriage. Show them that mom and dad can love each other. Show them that you can grab a quick kiss from each other. Do you work close together? Meet for lunch somewhere in between the two of you. Leave problems in the marriage between the TWO of you ONLY. Nobody wants to know about your problems. If you do need to talk to someone, make sure it is someone reliable. Someone you absolutely trust. Buy that lingerie: your husband will appreciate it and it will make you feel good about yourself. Explore sex with your partner! Women love sex, but we tend to shy away from the topic. It is as natural as it comes, and it should be just as natural with your husband!

The above is based off my personal experiences. I hope it helps you the way it has helped me when I need to take the time to reflect. Take care of the man that takes care of you; water your marriage so that it keeps flourishing.

Here are some fun pictures going back 10+ years pre-baby…